GWC presents Chi-Town Rumble '85: Champ crown + shock ending
Feb 16, 2019 21:14:59 GMT
Post by thecommish on Feb 16, 2019 21:14:59 GMT
Global Wrestling Council presents: Chi-Town Rumble
UIC Pavillion, Chicago, Illinois
Friday 2/15/1985
Live on USA Network
Hosts: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura
Opening clips of the Global Wrestling Council superstars play over the Phil Collins hit ‘Don’t Lose My Number’:
Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura open the Chi-Town from the UIC Pavillion, and introduce fans to this new era in professional wrestling from the Global Wrestling Council. The two go over the rules of the Chi-Town Rumble match to crown the Global Heavyweight Champion later tonight - then next week the St. Paul Scramble to crown the St. Paul Tag Team Champions.
Jesse Ventura then tells Gorilla Monsoon that before the night is through, he is going to shock the professional wrestling world! Ventura will prove he is The Mind as well as The Body by delivering the biggest wrestling scoop of the year right here tonight on the USA Network. Gorilla Monsoon thinks that’s “highly unlikely”, but sends us up to a special preview of next week’s St. Paul Scramble before we get to the St. Paul Scramble!
THE HENNIGS: LARRY ‘THE AXE’ & CURT HENNIG VS THE REGULATORS: DICK SLATER & BOB ORTON JR.
The father-and-son duo of the Hennigs get a nice reception, since they are well known from the Chicago crowd. Ventura mentions that he knows both generations of the Hennigs, and he believes Curt will be a future Global Heavyweight Champion someday if he lives up to his potential. Curt starts off strong against Ace Orton, taking him down with a flying head-scissors and then back over with a flying arm-drag. Curt then takes off and plants Orton with the leaping snap mare, before tagging out to father Larry Hennig.
Veteran The Axe is in, and shoots Orton off the ropes, but the wily Dick Slater makes the tag off his partner’s back in view of the referee. Slater drills Hennig from behind with a knee to the back, then plants him with a scoop slam. They call Slater Mr. Unpredictable because it’s very hard to keep up with him in the ring, and he proves them by bending every rule possible. In the end, Bob Orton runs interference between the referee and Curt Hennig while Dick Slater plants Larry Hennig with the pile-driver for a pin. Slater re-directs the referee and scores the three count. The Regulators have some momentum leading into next week’s Scramble match!
WINNERS: THE REGULATORS
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COMMERCIAL BREAK
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Vince McMahon joins us from backstage and introduces some taped promos from the Chi-Town Rumble entrants…
- Cut to Nick Bockwinkel smirking at the camera. -
Nick Bockwinkel: “I’m not a man who believes often that there are events beyond my control. I’ve prided myself throughout my illustrious career of going out to that squared circle in front of the hordes of humanoids, and no matter who the opponent, no matter where the godforsaken place they’ve sent me, Nick Bockwinkel is in control of events and always a moment away from procuring a victory from his opponents. But a preponderance of events beyond even the expectations of a wise man such as I has brought us to this point, where to prove I am the very best professional athlete in the world today, I must defeat 19 others.
“Not in a far way like in a tournament. No, I’m required to face them all at the same time. I imagine GWC commissioner Buddy Rogers had quite a smile on his face when he backed Nick Bockwinkel into such a corner, but not so fast Mr. Rogers. I’ve beaten them all individually. My greatest trick of all, the one that will amuse and confound like no other before, is when I beat them all… at the same time!”
- Cut to The U.S. Connection, Ricky Steamboat and Ted Dibiase. -
Ricky Steamboat: “Theodore, we’ve got not one but two incredible opportunities ahead of us. The St. Paul Scramble where you and I will be tested as a team like never before by facing five of the very best. But before that, we may be forced to do battle when we take part in the Chi-Town Rumble,”
Ted Dibiase: “The way I look at like this is, Ricky. We approach these like isolated incidents. We train hard, harder than ever before, as a team for the St. Paul Scramble. We study all five other teams, we know them inside and out. And we get the ring team in order to prove to them that while they might have the experience edge in teaming longer, the U.S. Connection is undeniable as a tag team. And when it comes to the Chi-Town Rumble, it’s every man for himself, and we treat like an opportunity for one us to become a double champion. If you win, I’ll be damned proud, and I hope when I win, you’ll be just as proud.”
Ricky Steamboat: “Certainly… but you said, when you win.”
Ted Dibiase: “Well, a man’s got to be confident, right?”
Ricky Steamboat: “Right. When I throw you out, I promise beers will be on me that night!”
- Cut to Sheik Adnan El-Kaissie, Sheik Blackwell and the Iron Sheik already ranting like lunatics. -
Sheik Adnan: “Allah Akbhar, ALLL HOO LA HAM! VERNE GAGNE, YOOOOO SHOULD HAVE STAYED REEEEETIRED!”
Sheik Blackwell: “Let me tell ya’all somethin’! I’m comin’ to the Chi-Town Rumble with three things in mind. Number one, to squash the old coot Gagne like a bug and finish him off fer good! Two, I’m gonna win me that Global Heavyweight Championship, and then me an’ the Sheik’ur gonna bring it to Tehran! But the most improtant thing of all, Andre the so-called Giant. They say you ain’t never lost no Battle Royals. Well get ready son because Blackwell’s gonna fix that for ya!”
Iron Sheik: “CAMERAMAN ZOOM! TEHRAN, IRAN - NUMBER ONE! BAGHDAD, IRAQ - NUMBER ONE! USA - HACK PTOOOOOOEY!”
- Cut to ‘The American Dream’ Dusty Rhodes on his cattle ranch. -
Dusty Rhodes: “Ya know, baybee, it’s been one long yeear that the Dream has watched and waited. I been on my ranch down in Austin, babybee, and my ranch-hands, the people in town, hell my own children be comin’ up to me and sayin’, Big Dust, when ya comin’ back to the ring? They say, ‘we need ya back in the ring, baybeee’. I gotta tell ya I am soooo ‘cited because the time is nay-ow. The stay-age couldn’t be any bigger, ya understand? Chi-Town, where the Texas Outlaws done fought til the lights went out back in the day, if ya rememb-ah, babybee. It’s been a long tiii-ime, but The Dream is comin’ home, and he’s lookin’ to reach that top of the mountain once aga-ain! 19 of the best in the way, try and stop the Bull uh’ the Woods if ya can. It’s gon’ be one funky bunkhouse stampede in Chi-Town when The Dream is back in town!”
- ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage throwing confetti in the air. -
‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage: “Freak out, freak out! The Madness is about to sweep the nation, uh huh, yeeeees it is! History beckons the Macho Man to Chi-Town, and that’s real nice, uh-huh, because what I happen to do best is ruuuuuumble! That’s right, uh-huh! When the Macho Man hits the ring, it’s gonna be 350 miles per hour of pure madness acceleration! Hoooooke Hogan! American Dream! Ragin’ Bull! And yeaaaaah even you Andreeee the Giant, get out of the Macho Man’s way, or YOU GET TOSSED OUT! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”
- Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler is standing by with his Royal Family: Lord William Dundee and The Blonde Batallian: Sir Wayne Ferris and Squire Buddy Landell. -
Jerry ‘The KIng’ Lawler: “Boys, we’re a long way from Memphis, but I’ve taken a long look around at our new kingdom and quite frankly, I’m not very impressed.”
Lord William Dundee: “It’s not much to look at, Kingfish.”
Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler: “I tried to tell these Global Wrestling Council people that they should have the first event in Memphis, not Chicago! I mean, who’d want to risk their life going down Halsted Street when they could have the time of their life on Beale Street.”
Buddy Landell: “And hey, St. Paul ain’t much better, King! The Twin Cities are more like the Twin Travesties compared to the Southern Comfort we’re used to down in Mempho, baby. That’s right, I said it!”
Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler: “Okay that’s enough! Let’s show these people a little Southern hospitality - after all, getting to see us is the best part of their pointless lives anyway! And that’s why I’m calling on every pee-on in this Chi-Town Rumble to do the right thing. All I keep hearing about is how there are 12 former world champions. That’s great. But you know what there’s only one of in this match? There’s only one King! And you’re lookin’ at him.”
Lord William Dundee: “You tell ‘em, Kingfish.”
Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler: “So Hulk Hogan, Dusty Rhodes, Andre the Giant, Verne Gagne, Nick Bockwinkel, I’m talkin’ to each and every one of you lowly subjects in the Chi-Town Rumble. When The King enters the match, I command you to throw yourselves over the top rope because a King shouldn’t have to break a sweat to claim his rightful inheritance!”
Lord William Dundee: “By royal decree, you have the Kingfish’s proclamation!”
- Cut to ‘The Incredible’ Hulk Hogan benching huge amounts of weight in the gym, before sitting up. -
Hulk Hogan: “Well you know somethin’ dude, Hulkamaniacs from coast to coast have been askin’ me what’s the ultimate grudge match after Rocky III. How can the Hulkster ever top knocking out The Italian Stallion? On February 15, Chi-Town Rumble, 22 of the biggest, baddest dudes are gonna be bashin’ heads in one ring, hangin’ and bangin’ until there’s only one survivor left! Rocky wouldn’t stand a chance, brah! The list of names sends shockwaves through the core of the earth, man! The Dream, the Funks, Tricky Nick, The King, the Macho Man, the Sheiks, my Big Brother Andre and then you got me, The Hulkster. All those other guys, they’re bad dudes, and they’re gonna fight like hell, but what they don’t got is they don’t got the Hulkmaniacs in their corner. If it ever gets hairy in there, all I gotta do is reach my hand out, and feed off the energy of the people. Let their electricity run through my body, show the world that THIS is where the power lies. So I have just one question for the other entrants of the Chi-Town Rumble: WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN THE POWER OF THE HULKAMANIA… RUNS WILD… ON YOOOOOOOOOOU?!”
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Commercial break
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Let’s go now to ring announcer Howard Finkel in the ring for the Chi-Town Rumble match instructions!
Howard Finkel: “It is now time for the Chi-Town Rumble match! Here are the rules: In just a few moments, the men who drew numbers one and two respectively will enter the ring and the Rumble match will begin. Every 90 seconds thereafter, another superstar enters the ring according to the number he drew. Elimination occurs when a superstar is thrown over the top rope with both feet hitting the floor. The individual who remains in the ring after all competitors have entered will be declared the winner of the Chi-Town Rumble.
“Noooooooow, let us all find out who drew nuuuuuuuuuumber ooooooone!”
IT’S FORMER NWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION TERRY FUNK!P/B]
IT’S RICK STEAMBOAT OF THE U.S. CONNECTION
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk)
The Chi-Town Rumble starts off perhaps with another preview of next week’s St. Paul Scramble as one-half of the famous Funks from the Double Cross Ranch in Amarillo, Texas faces off with Rick Steamboat of the U.S. Connection. Funk is accompanied to the ring by his manager, ‘The Mouth of the South’ Jimmy Hart, and he’s furious about having drawn the first entry in this Rumble.
Funk and Steamboat lock up, with Rick immediately taking down the former NWA World Heavyweight Champion one of his deep arm-drags. Funk pops back up and complains to one of the referees on the floor that his hair was pulled, but that didn’t happen and the referees couldn’t stop it anyway! As Steamboat protests his innocence, Funk shows his true colors by kneeing him below the belt and then delivering an elbow across the back of the neck. Funk then plants Steamboat with a neck-breaker. Here we go…
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S SUPERSTAR BILLY GRAHAM!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Graham)
Another former World Champion is on his way to the ring, this time of the old World Wide Wrestling Federation. Terry Funk holds the top and middle rope open for Superstar Graham, thinking he has an ally for some reason. Graham comes through and Funk proposes an alliance, perhaps thinking there’s a kinship since they both come from famous wrestling families. Superstar Graham just sticks one finger in Funk’s face and wags it - no alliance tonight!
Terry Funk is furious, rears back and cocks his fist - but he’s dropkicked from the side by Rick Steamboat! Funk goes flying over the top rope, but he clings to it with dear life and manages to catch himself. Steamboat is right on him trying to force himself out. Meanwhile, Superstar Graham takes the opportunity to pose.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S THE IRON SHEIK!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Graham, Sheik)
The former World Heavyweight Champions just keep coming. Superstar Graham is squaring up when the Sheik rolls into the ring. Sheik slaps his chest, twists his mustache and shouts “Iran #1” to a huge amount of boos. Graham charges, but gets booted to the but by one of the curled-toed boots. Sheik and Graham are slugging away at each other here.
Meanwhile, Terry Funk has managed to roll his body back into the ring and he kicks Steamboat away. Funk rakes the eyes to finally break Steamboat’s grip and then drives him to the canvas with a piledriver. Now, Funk stumbles across the ring with a double sledge to the chiseled back of Superstar Graham. With the help of the Iron Sheik, Funk dumps Superstar Graham over and out! (Superstar Graham is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S TED DIBIASE!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase)
Rick Steamboat doesn’t have to worry about a two-on-one situation for long because here comes his U.S. Connection partner Ted Dibiase. Dibiase storms into the ring and is fists of fire on both Terry Funk and the Iron Sheik. Dibiase shoots Funk off the ropes and propels him to the canvas with a high-angle back-drop, then levels him with a fist drop across the forehead.
Iron Sheik is stomping on Rick Steamboat in the ring, but Dibiase spins him around and decks him. Together, Steamboat and Dibiase shoot Sheik off the ropes and drill him with a double shoulder-block! The U.S. Connection are on fire here. If they have this kind of momentum in the St. Paul Scramble, they will be unstoppable!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S THE MAGNIFICENT MURACO!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco)
In the ring, the U.S. Connection are setting up Terry Funk for their finisher, which is a high-speed power-slam from Dibiase followed by a flying cross-body splash off the top by Steamboat. However, Muraco breaks it up by hammering Dibiase across the back. Steamboat dives off for a flying chop on Muraco, but he levels Rick with a shot to the gut on the way down! Iron Sheik is up now to put the boots to Steamboat and Dibiase here.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S DA CRUSHER!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, Crusher)
Another former World Heavyweight Champion! The wrestler who made Milwaukee famous gets a huge ovation from the one-time AWA crowd as he jogs down the aisle with a cigar in his mouth. Crusher puts it out as he rolls into the ring and wallops an unsuspecting Terry Funk, who does one of his classic comedy bumps. Crusher then pulls Iron Sheik around and begins pounding on him.
Da Crusher has the crowd going as he lays into the Iron Sheik with shot after shot! However, Don Muraco nails him from behind, stopping the momentum. Together, Sheik and Muraco dump out Crusher, ending his short run in the match. (The Crusher is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S DORY FUNK JR.!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, D. Funk)
The odds for the U.S. Connection are certainly not looking good now! Dory Funk Jr, another former NWA World Heavyweight champion, joins his brother Terry in working over Ted Dibiase in one corner while Sheik and Muraco try to get Rick Steamboat out on the other side of the ring for the next 90 seconds.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S OTTO WANZ!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, D. Funk, Wanz)
Another former World Heavyweight Champion makes his way down the aisle - although it must be said the reaction to the German is tepid at best. Otto tries to milk it for all it’s work, stopping at ringside to shake hands and pose his not-at-all impressive physique. He steps onto the canvas, waving to all of his adoring fans who don’t exist.
Finally, Otto Wanz actually steps into the ring to enter the match properly… and gets a double clothesline from the Funks to send him right back out again! Otto doesn’t miss a bit beat, waving to his fans and smiling as he walks back to the dressing room. (Otto Wanz has been eliminated.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S MAD DOG VACHON!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, D. Funk, Vachon)
Here comes another former World Champion, and the Funks are ready. However, Rick Steamboat has broken away from Muraco and Sheik with some knife-edged chops and now he catches Dory Funk Jr. with a dropkick to send Dory over and out! (Dory Funk Jr. is eliminated) Steamboat hurls Terry Funk across the ropes and accidentally sends him colliding into his tag team partner Ted Dibiase, knocking Dibiase out onto the apron.
Steamboat checks on Dibiase until Funk attacks from behind while Mad Dog Vachon enters and begins hammering both Muraco and Sheik. Terry Funk goes to toss out Steamboat, but Rick puts on the breaks and sends Funk over the top rope! Funk collides with Dibiase on the apron again, knocking Dibiase to the floor! (Ted Dibiase is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ANDRE THE GIANT!/B]
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Muraco, Vachon, Andre)
There’s a huge ovation for the Giant making his way down to the ring. Back in the ring, Terry Funk slinks back in while Rick Steamboat apologizes to partner Ted Dibiase for the miscue. Dibiase is frustrated but tells his U.S. Connection partner to go win the match and gives him a thumb’s up, before heading off to the dressing room with his hands on his hips.
Andre steps right over the top rope and greets the Iron Sheik with a boot to the face. Don Muraco charges but gets swatted away as well. Terry Funk is just getting to his feet when Andre levels him with a headbutt, then hurls him over the top rope and out! (Terry Funk has been eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S JERRY ‘THE KING’ LAWLER!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Vachon, Andre, Lawler)
The King is followed by Lord William Dundee, and they’re cautiously taking their time getting down to the ring while observing Andre the Giant clearing house. Lawler finally slides in and when Andre spots him, The King holds his hands up like he doesn’t want any trouble. The King instead offers a handshake to the Giant as the fans here in Chicago boo him relentlessly.
Andre cracks a smile and looks around at the fans for their advice on if he should shake The King’s hand. Andre decides to shake Lawler’s hand, and The King has a grin from ear-to-ear. But that changes quickly when Andre begins applying pressure, immediately bringing Lawler to his knees begging for mercy. From behind, the Iron Sheik drives one of his boots into Andre’s back. The Giant releases his grip and turns around, while Lawler rolls over to the ropes so Dundee can massage his injured hand.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S PEDRO MORALES!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Vachon, Andre, Lawler, Morales)
The former WWWF World Champion sprints down the aisle, and hits the ring with shots on one-time rival Don Muraco. He plants Muraco with a big slam, and as Mad Dog Vachon charges, he ducks and back drops the Mad Dog over the top rope and out to the floor. (Mad Dog Vachon is eliminated.)
Andre The Giant has Iron Sheik bent over the top rope and lays into him with a vicious chop down across the chest! Lawler is back on his feet now and steering very clear of Andre, he blindsides Morales from behind and dumps Morales out by hooking the tights. (Pedro Morales is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S BOB BACKLUND!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund)
Former WWWF Heavyweight Champion Bob Backlund jogs to the ring and immediately goes after the man who dethroned him for that title, the Iron Sheik. Backlund takes Sheik down, but Sheik rolls over and grabs a crossface on him, with Backlund countering in kind. Their scuffle is broken up when Jerry Lawler drops an elbow on Backlund, then backs up, climbs to the second rope and levels him with a flying fist drop.
The King pops back up and laughs maniacally while Lord Dundee cheers him on from the floor. However, Andre the Giant grips Lawler’s head from behind and The King’s eyes bug out. Andre levels him with one… two… three headbutts! Down goes The King! Meanwhile, Muraco is trying to use all of his body weight to force Steamboat over and out.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S CRUSHER BLACKWELL!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund, Blackwell)
The Mountain from Stone Mountain is accompanied to ringside by his manager Sheik Adnan El-Kaissie and we heard him earlier say that his one goal in this match is take out Andre the Giant. Blackwell hits the ring and he’s immediately throwing forearms at Andre, who doesn’t back up an inch. Andre levels Blackwell with a headbutt, yet it doesn’t even stagger the Crusher.
Crusher Blackwell bounces back off the ropes and then clotheslines Andre, staggering him. He hits the ropes for another, but gets a boot to the face from Andre that staggers the Mountain from Stone Mountain. Rick Steamboat now lays into Blackwell with chops to the chest, but Blackwell picks him up and hurls him over the top rope! Rick Steamboat’s long run in the Rumble has been ended by Crusher Blackwell! (Rick Steamboat is eliminated.)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ‘THE AMERICAN DREAM’ DUSTY RHODES!
(In the ring: Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund, Blackwell, Rhodes)
Former NWA World Heavyweight Champion Dusty Rhodes fires up the Chicago crowd as he jukes and jives down the aisle of the UIC Pavillion. Once in the ring, Andre has leveled Blackwell with a headbutt and the Crusher walks right into a Bionic Elbow from the Dream! Blackwell is staggered, walking into a second headbutt from Andre, then a second Bionic Elbow from the Dream! Then, at the same time, Andre headbutts Blackwell and the Dream levels him with a third Bionic Elbow and down goes Blackwell! Andre raises his arm and Dusty leaps up for a high-five.
The celebration is short-lived when The King sundays Dusty from behind, but Rhodes is on a roll. Dusty unloads on Lawler with rights, lefts and then flip, flops and flies with another Bionic Elbow to send The King to the canvas! Dusty Rhodes jukes and jives as the crowd get to their feet to cheer on the American Dream!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S LARRY ZBYSZKO!
(In the ring: Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko)
The self-proclaimed Living Legend of Professional Wrestling hits the ring just as Backlund has Iron Sheik in serious danger. Zbyszko scoops Backlund by the tights and dumps him over top of Sheik, sending Backlund tumbling to the floor. (Bob Backlund has been eliminated) Meanwhile, Lawler and Muraco are both working on Andre on the other side of the ring. Andre is holding his own fighting them off, but then Larry Zbyszko joins in.
Dusty Rhodes tries to get the villains off the Giant, but Blackwell decks him from behind and puts the boots to the Dream. With Muraco, Lawler, Sheik and Zbyszko holding Andre against the ropes, Blackwell charges and drills the Giant with a clothesline sending him backwards over the top rope to the floor! Blackwell has done it! He’s eliminated Andre the Giant! (Andre the Giant is eliminated)
The gravity of the situation is now dawning on Dusty Rhodes. He’s now all alone in the ring with the Iron Sheik, Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler, The Magnificent Muraco, Larry Zbyszko and the man who just eliminated Andre the Giant, Crusher Blackwell!
But not for long!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULK HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGAN!
(In the ring: Sheik, Muraco, Lawler, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan)
The roof nearly comes off the UIC Pavillion as The Hulkster storms down to the ring just as the heels all pounce on The American Dream. Hogan hits the ring like a house on fire, drilling Zbyszko with the Axe Bomber, rocking Muraco with a running forearm smash and cracking Sheik and Blackwell’s heads together. Hogan then motions that he’s gonna slam Blackwell, and he does it! He just slammed the Mountain from Stone Mountain!
Hulk has the Sheik by the back of the head now, takes off running and flings him over the top rope and out! (Iron Sheik is eliminated!) Muraco tries to land a double sledge, but Hogan boots him in the gut, hoists him up into an Atomic Drop and then clotheslines him over and out! (Don Muraco is eliminated!) Hogan then strikes a pose while the countdown begins.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S NICK BOCKWINKEL
The former AWA World Heavyweight Champion gets the chilly reception he probably expected and relishes in the boos as he takes a bow as he steps onto the ring apron. Nick Bockwinkel steps into the ring, where old rival Hulk Hogan is motioning for him to bring it on. Bockwinkel cracks a smile, shakes his head no and points behind Hogan. Blackwell levels Hulk with a double sledge across the back and then begins putting the boots The Hulkster.
Bockwinkel joins Lawler and Zbyszko in stomping on Dusty Rhodes in the opposite corner. Nick seems to be calling the shots, which ticks off The King. These two have their own storied rivalry, so now The King and Bockwinkel are arguing with each other. From the floor, Lord Dundee is urging them to focus on Dusty Rhodes.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S VERNE GAGNE!
(In the ring:Lawler, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel, Gagne)
It’s one more turn for the old champ Verne here in Chicago tonight and he gets a hero’s welcome on his way down to the ring! The arguing between Bockwinkel and Lawler provides the perfect distraction for Verne Gagne to enter and wallop his old nemesis Nick with a right hand across the jaw. Gagne is unloading on Bockwinkel now, and scoops him up into an airplane spin to a huge round of applause.
Meanwhile, Crusher Blackwell has Hogan in the opposite corner and he’s signaling for the running splash. Blackwell takes off with a head of steam… but Hogan dodges at the last second! Blackwell is woozy on his feet as Hogan hits the ropes for a forearm smash! Blackwell falls into the ropes but is still up, while Hogan charges again with a second forearm smash! Finally, a third forearm smash sends Blackwell tumbling backwards over and out! (Crusher Blackwell is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ‘THE MACHO MAN’ RANDY SAVAGE!
(In the ring:Lawler, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel, Gagne, Savage)
The Macho Man is full of energy as he sprints down the aisle, hops to the apron and then leaps over the top rope into the squared circle. Savage charges across the aisle with a flying knee into Hogan’s back to send Hulkster crashing into the turnbuckle. The Macho Man scales the top rope now, and that’s dangerous territory in a match like this! Savage comes flying off with a double axe-handle smash across Hogan’s forehead to send him crumbling to the canvas. Savage shoots the one arm into the air and spins his finger around as the fans boo.
Meanwhile, Larry Zbyszko is choking Dusty Rhodes using the bottom rope. Bockwinkel has Gagne locked in a side-headlock, but his old rival jolts him with a series of elbow shots to the side. Gagne manages to break the hold just as the countdown to the final entrant begins!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ‘THE RAGIN’ BULL’ MANNY FERNANDEZ!
(In the ring:Lawler, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel, Gagne, Savage, Ragin’ Bull)
The Ragin’ Bull hits the ring and immediately lays out Larry Zbyszko with the Flying Burrito coming off the ropes. Meanwhile, Nick Bockwinkel locks set to plant Verne Gagne with a piledriver. However, Gagne puts on the breaks! Gagne backdrops Bockwinkel, who flies over the top rope to the floor! (Nick Bockwinkel has been eliminated) As Verne Gagne raises his arms as if in victory while looking down at old enemy Bockwinkel on the floor, the Macho Man lands a big running knee to the back that sends Gagne gingerly bumping over the top rope and to the floor! ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage has just thrown out the legendary former AWA Champion! (Verne Gagne is eliminated!) Bockwinkel laughs at his rival while jogging to the dressing room, with Verne Gagne giving chase.
In the ring, Hulk Hogan is having his eyes raked by The King in one corner while The Ragin Bull is working over Larry Zbyszko in the other. Dusty Rhodes is pulling himself up now, just in time to get a sledge across the forehead from the Macho Man. Manny Fernandez has Zbyszko against the ropes and goes for another Flying Burrito but it’s a risk he shouldn’t have taken, because The Living Legend ducked and held down the top rope. That sent Fernandez down to the floor and out! (Manny Fernandez is out!)
Larry Zbyszko taunts the fans by pointing to his temples, indicating he’s smarter than the likes of The Ragin’ Ball. But not smart enough to be aware of his surroundings because The Dream was up and laid into him with rights, lefts, and then a Bionic Elbow that sent him bouncing over the top and to the floor. (Larry Zbyszko is eliminated)
We’re down to the final four here! In one corner, Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler and ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage talk strategy while in the other it’s Hulk Hogan and ‘The American Dream’ Dusty Rhodes. Hogan and Rhodes charge across the ring, with Hulk laying into Savage and Lawler battling with Rhodes. The Dream boots The King in the stomach and connects with a Bionic Elbow.
Lawler starts going backwards over the top rope, but from the outside, Lord Dundee reaches in and grabs Rhodes’ leg! Dusty is trying to free himself but it gives Lawler a second to recover and he pounces with some trademark vicious right hands to The Dream’s face while the referees try pulling Dundee away from Rhodes. The King then goes low with a kick between the legs before hoisting Dusty over the top rope and out! (Dusty Rhodes is eliminated)
On the other side of the ring. Randy Savage has tied the turnbuckle rope around Hogan’s throat to choke and now The King is over to begin stomping the chest. The two work over Hogan for several minutes, before Lawler motions for the end. The King hoists Hogan into the air and drops him with one of his patented leaping pile-drivers! Then, Randy Savage comes flying off the top rope with the elbow drop across the chest! But no sooner does Savage get back to his feet does Hogan sit up too…
The Macho Man can’t believe! The King can’t believe! Savage stomps Hogan, and it has no effect! Lawler decks Hogan, and it has no effect! Hogan is running on adrenaline as he powers up to his feet, shaking off more attacks and points to both! YOU! Hogan blocks a right hand from Savage, and sends him flipping to the canvas with one of his own! A right hand to Lawler sends The King back-bumping to the mat. The Hulker grabs Macho Man by the back of the head and launches him clean over the top rope and all the way out to the aisle! (‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage is eliminated)
Now, it’s The King’s turn! Lawler is begging off! He is on his knees begging for mercy here from The Hulkster. Hogan is shaking his head no! Seeing he’s getting nowhere, Lawler stands up and angrily demands Hogan bow down to him. Hogan can’t believe it! Lawler is ordering Hogan to bow down as Hogan stands staring at him, hands on hips. Lawler is now screaming at Hogan to comply, telling The Hulkster that it’s a royal decree! Finally, Hogan has had enough and he decks Lawler to send him to the canvas! Hogan then points to the aisle, motioning to fans he’s about to launch Lawler out to end this match!
Lord Dundee is on the apron though! Hogan is over and he collars Dundee. Lord Dundee is begging him not to hit him, promising he’ll go away if he’s released. Hogan listens for a second, then runs Dundee across the apron and head-first into the steel turnbuckle to send him flying to the floor! Hogan looks back at Lawler, who is screaming towards the dressing room and motioning. Out come the Blonde Battalion, Sir Wayne Ferris and Squire Buddy Landell!
The Blondes don’t look very excited to be getting involved but they have their orders from The King, so they charge up to the apron where Hogan doesn’t even let them step into the ring before cracking their heads together and launching them to the floor. The distraction allows Lawler to strike from behind, hook Hogan’s tights and try forcing him over the top rope. It looks for a moment like King's stunt might have been successful, but Hogan uses one hand to steady himself on the canvas and powers Lawler off of him with his right leg.
Lawler comes back around and eats a running axe bomber from the Hulkster! Hulk hits the ropes, and connects with the running leg drop! He pops back up and cups the ear as the fans cheer. He motions for one more and gets a huge ovation, so Hogan hits the ropes for a second running leg drop on The King! Hulkster then hoists Lawler up and throws him down onto his Royal Family on the floor! (Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler is eliminated)
Hulk Hogan has done it! He has won the Global Heavyweight Championship here at the Chi-Town Rumble!
Winner: *New* Global Heavyweight Champion Hulk Hogan
Vince McMahon tells fans that we’re running short on time, but there’s really only one thing left to see and that’s The Hulkster in all on his glory!
“HOLD ON, CUT THE MUSIC!”
Gorilla Monsoon isn’t sure what’s going on because his broadcast partner Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura has just stood up with a live microphone. Ventura waits until ‘Real American’ stops playing here in the UIC Pavillion.
Jesse Ventura: “Hey Chump Hogan… yeah YOU. I’m talkin’ to YOU, Hogan!”
Hulk Hogan has stopped his posedown, slings the Global Heavyweight Title and is now staring confused at Jesse Ventura over at the broadcast position.
Jesse Ventura: “I hope you enjoyed your little celebration but Jesse ‘The Mindy’ Ventura is here to tell you, Chump Hogan, that what you just did is meaningless!”
Hogan can be seen shouting “What the hell is he talking about?” as the camera cuts back to him for a second. The shot then goes back to Jesse Ventura pulling an elongated jewelry box out from under the broadcast desk.
Jesse Ventura: “See Chump Hogan, somebody wants to send you a message and because Jesse ‘The Mind’ Ventura is the preeminent broadcast journalist in the sport today, they asked me to deliver it to you. That strap you have is real pretty, but someone is on his way here, and he’s got a REAL championship. Why don’t you hit his music while I show you!”
There’s a buzz as Jesse Ventura hands an audiotape to the sound guy and a few seconds second later, the strains can be heard in the UIC Pavillion…
The unmistakable music coincides with Jesse Ventura opening the box directly to camera to reveal…
THE NWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP BELT!
Gorilla Monsoon “Jess, gimme a break! You cannot show that on television! There were lawsuits!”
Jesse Ventura: “Gino Monsoon, I can do whatever I want! Chump Hogan, you and I both know who owns that belt. The Real World Heavyweight Champion! And he’d like me to deliver a message to you: Diamonds are forever and so is the Nature Boy! HAHA!”
Hopefully we’ll have more information next week at the St. Paul Scramble!
© 1985, GLOBAL WRESTLING COUNCIL
UIC Pavillion, Chicago, Illinois
Friday 2/15/1985
Live on USA Network
Hosts: Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura
Opening clips of the Global Wrestling Council superstars play over the Phil Collins hit ‘Don’t Lose My Number’:
Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura open the Chi-Town from the UIC Pavillion, and introduce fans to this new era in professional wrestling from the Global Wrestling Council. The two go over the rules of the Chi-Town Rumble match to crown the Global Heavyweight Champion later tonight - then next week the St. Paul Scramble to crown the St. Paul Tag Team Champions.
Jesse Ventura then tells Gorilla Monsoon that before the night is through, he is going to shock the professional wrestling world! Ventura will prove he is The Mind as well as The Body by delivering the biggest wrestling scoop of the year right here tonight on the USA Network. Gorilla Monsoon thinks that’s “highly unlikely”, but sends us up to a special preview of next week’s St. Paul Scramble before we get to the St. Paul Scramble!
THE HENNIGS: LARRY ‘THE AXE’ & CURT HENNIG VS THE REGULATORS: DICK SLATER & BOB ORTON JR.
The father-and-son duo of the Hennigs get a nice reception, since they are well known from the Chicago crowd. Ventura mentions that he knows both generations of the Hennigs, and he believes Curt will be a future Global Heavyweight Champion someday if he lives up to his potential. Curt starts off strong against Ace Orton, taking him down with a flying head-scissors and then back over with a flying arm-drag. Curt then takes off and plants Orton with the leaping snap mare, before tagging out to father Larry Hennig.
Veteran The Axe is in, and shoots Orton off the ropes, but the wily Dick Slater makes the tag off his partner’s back in view of the referee. Slater drills Hennig from behind with a knee to the back, then plants him with a scoop slam. They call Slater Mr. Unpredictable because it’s very hard to keep up with him in the ring, and he proves them by bending every rule possible. In the end, Bob Orton runs interference between the referee and Curt Hennig while Dick Slater plants Larry Hennig with the pile-driver for a pin. Slater re-directs the referee and scores the three count. The Regulators have some momentum leading into next week’s Scramble match!
WINNERS: THE REGULATORS
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COMMERCIAL BREAK
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Vince McMahon joins us from backstage and introduces some taped promos from the Chi-Town Rumble entrants…
- Cut to Nick Bockwinkel smirking at the camera. -
Nick Bockwinkel: “I’m not a man who believes often that there are events beyond my control. I’ve prided myself throughout my illustrious career of going out to that squared circle in front of the hordes of humanoids, and no matter who the opponent, no matter where the godforsaken place they’ve sent me, Nick Bockwinkel is in control of events and always a moment away from procuring a victory from his opponents. But a preponderance of events beyond even the expectations of a wise man such as I has brought us to this point, where to prove I am the very best professional athlete in the world today, I must defeat 19 others.
“Not in a far way like in a tournament. No, I’m required to face them all at the same time. I imagine GWC commissioner Buddy Rogers had quite a smile on his face when he backed Nick Bockwinkel into such a corner, but not so fast Mr. Rogers. I’ve beaten them all individually. My greatest trick of all, the one that will amuse and confound like no other before, is when I beat them all… at the same time!”
- Cut to The U.S. Connection, Ricky Steamboat and Ted Dibiase. -
Ricky Steamboat: “Theodore, we’ve got not one but two incredible opportunities ahead of us. The St. Paul Scramble where you and I will be tested as a team like never before by facing five of the very best. But before that, we may be forced to do battle when we take part in the Chi-Town Rumble,”
Ted Dibiase: “The way I look at like this is, Ricky. We approach these like isolated incidents. We train hard, harder than ever before, as a team for the St. Paul Scramble. We study all five other teams, we know them inside and out. And we get the ring team in order to prove to them that while they might have the experience edge in teaming longer, the U.S. Connection is undeniable as a tag team. And when it comes to the Chi-Town Rumble, it’s every man for himself, and we treat like an opportunity for one us to become a double champion. If you win, I’ll be damned proud, and I hope when I win, you’ll be just as proud.”
Ricky Steamboat: “Certainly… but you said, when you win.”
Ted Dibiase: “Well, a man’s got to be confident, right?”
Ricky Steamboat: “Right. When I throw you out, I promise beers will be on me that night!”
- Cut to Sheik Adnan El-Kaissie, Sheik Blackwell and the Iron Sheik already ranting like lunatics. -
Sheik Adnan: “Allah Akbhar, ALLL HOO LA HAM! VERNE GAGNE, YOOOOO SHOULD HAVE STAYED REEEEETIRED!”
Sheik Blackwell: “Let me tell ya’all somethin’! I’m comin’ to the Chi-Town Rumble with three things in mind. Number one, to squash the old coot Gagne like a bug and finish him off fer good! Two, I’m gonna win me that Global Heavyweight Championship, and then me an’ the Sheik’ur gonna bring it to Tehran! But the most improtant thing of all, Andre the so-called Giant. They say you ain’t never lost no Battle Royals. Well get ready son because Blackwell’s gonna fix that for ya!”
Iron Sheik: “CAMERAMAN ZOOM! TEHRAN, IRAN - NUMBER ONE! BAGHDAD, IRAQ - NUMBER ONE! USA - HACK PTOOOOOOEY!”
- Cut to ‘The American Dream’ Dusty Rhodes on his cattle ranch. -
Dusty Rhodes: “Ya know, baybee, it’s been one long yeear that the Dream has watched and waited. I been on my ranch down in Austin, babybee, and my ranch-hands, the people in town, hell my own children be comin’ up to me and sayin’, Big Dust, when ya comin’ back to the ring? They say, ‘we need ya back in the ring, baybeee’. I gotta tell ya I am soooo ‘cited because the time is nay-ow. The stay-age couldn’t be any bigger, ya understand? Chi-Town, where the Texas Outlaws done fought til the lights went out back in the day, if ya rememb-ah, babybee. It’s been a long tiii-ime, but The Dream is comin’ home, and he’s lookin’ to reach that top of the mountain once aga-ain! 19 of the best in the way, try and stop the Bull uh’ the Woods if ya can. It’s gon’ be one funky bunkhouse stampede in Chi-Town when The Dream is back in town!”
- ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage throwing confetti in the air. -
‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage: “Freak out, freak out! The Madness is about to sweep the nation, uh huh, yeeeees it is! History beckons the Macho Man to Chi-Town, and that’s real nice, uh-huh, because what I happen to do best is ruuuuuumble! That’s right, uh-huh! When the Macho Man hits the ring, it’s gonna be 350 miles per hour of pure madness acceleration! Hoooooke Hogan! American Dream! Ragin’ Bull! And yeaaaaah even you Andreeee the Giant, get out of the Macho Man’s way, or YOU GET TOSSED OUT! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”
- Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler is standing by with his Royal Family: Lord William Dundee and The Blonde Batallian: Sir Wayne Ferris and Squire Buddy Landell. -
Jerry ‘The KIng’ Lawler: “Boys, we’re a long way from Memphis, but I’ve taken a long look around at our new kingdom and quite frankly, I’m not very impressed.”
Lord William Dundee: “It’s not much to look at, Kingfish.”
Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler: “I tried to tell these Global Wrestling Council people that they should have the first event in Memphis, not Chicago! I mean, who’d want to risk their life going down Halsted Street when they could have the time of their life on Beale Street.”
Buddy Landell: “And hey, St. Paul ain’t much better, King! The Twin Cities are more like the Twin Travesties compared to the Southern Comfort we’re used to down in Mempho, baby. That’s right, I said it!”
Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler: “Okay that’s enough! Let’s show these people a little Southern hospitality - after all, getting to see us is the best part of their pointless lives anyway! And that’s why I’m calling on every pee-on in this Chi-Town Rumble to do the right thing. All I keep hearing about is how there are 12 former world champions. That’s great. But you know what there’s only one of in this match? There’s only one King! And you’re lookin’ at him.”
Lord William Dundee: “You tell ‘em, Kingfish.”
Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler: “So Hulk Hogan, Dusty Rhodes, Andre the Giant, Verne Gagne, Nick Bockwinkel, I’m talkin’ to each and every one of you lowly subjects in the Chi-Town Rumble. When The King enters the match, I command you to throw yourselves over the top rope because a King shouldn’t have to break a sweat to claim his rightful inheritance!”
Lord William Dundee: “By royal decree, you have the Kingfish’s proclamation!”
- Cut to ‘The Incredible’ Hulk Hogan benching huge amounts of weight in the gym, before sitting up. -
Hulk Hogan: “Well you know somethin’ dude, Hulkamaniacs from coast to coast have been askin’ me what’s the ultimate grudge match after Rocky III. How can the Hulkster ever top knocking out The Italian Stallion? On February 15, Chi-Town Rumble, 22 of the biggest, baddest dudes are gonna be bashin’ heads in one ring, hangin’ and bangin’ until there’s only one survivor left! Rocky wouldn’t stand a chance, brah! The list of names sends shockwaves through the core of the earth, man! The Dream, the Funks, Tricky Nick, The King, the Macho Man, the Sheiks, my Big Brother Andre and then you got me, The Hulkster. All those other guys, they’re bad dudes, and they’re gonna fight like hell, but what they don’t got is they don’t got the Hulkmaniacs in their corner. If it ever gets hairy in there, all I gotta do is reach my hand out, and feed off the energy of the people. Let their electricity run through my body, show the world that THIS is where the power lies. So I have just one question for the other entrants of the Chi-Town Rumble: WHATCHA GONNA DO WHEN THE POWER OF THE HULKAMANIA… RUNS WILD… ON YOOOOOOOOOOU?!”
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Commercial break
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Let’s go now to ring announcer Howard Finkel in the ring for the Chi-Town Rumble match instructions!
Howard Finkel: “It is now time for the Chi-Town Rumble match! Here are the rules: In just a few moments, the men who drew numbers one and two respectively will enter the ring and the Rumble match will begin. Every 90 seconds thereafter, another superstar enters the ring according to the number he drew. Elimination occurs when a superstar is thrown over the top rope with both feet hitting the floor. The individual who remains in the ring after all competitors have entered will be declared the winner of the Chi-Town Rumble.
“Noooooooow, let us all find out who drew nuuuuuuuuuumber ooooooone!”
Howard Finkel: “And noooooooooow, let us all find out who drew nuuuuuuumber twooooooo!”
IT’S RICK STEAMBOAT OF THE U.S. CONNECTION
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk)
The Chi-Town Rumble starts off perhaps with another preview of next week’s St. Paul Scramble as one-half of the famous Funks from the Double Cross Ranch in Amarillo, Texas faces off with Rick Steamboat of the U.S. Connection. Funk is accompanied to the ring by his manager, ‘The Mouth of the South’ Jimmy Hart, and he’s furious about having drawn the first entry in this Rumble.
Funk and Steamboat lock up, with Rick immediately taking down the former NWA World Heavyweight Champion one of his deep arm-drags. Funk pops back up and complains to one of the referees on the floor that his hair was pulled, but that didn’t happen and the referees couldn’t stop it anyway! As Steamboat protests his innocence, Funk shows his true colors by kneeing him below the belt and then delivering an elbow across the back of the neck. Funk then plants Steamboat with a neck-breaker. Here we go…
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S SUPERSTAR BILLY GRAHAM!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Graham)
Another former World Champion is on his way to the ring, this time of the old World Wide Wrestling Federation. Terry Funk holds the top and middle rope open for Superstar Graham, thinking he has an ally for some reason. Graham comes through and Funk proposes an alliance, perhaps thinking there’s a kinship since they both come from famous wrestling families. Superstar Graham just sticks one finger in Funk’s face and wags it - no alliance tonight!
Terry Funk is furious, rears back and cocks his fist - but he’s dropkicked from the side by Rick Steamboat! Funk goes flying over the top rope, but he clings to it with dear life and manages to catch himself. Steamboat is right on him trying to force himself out. Meanwhile, Superstar Graham takes the opportunity to pose.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S THE IRON SHEIK!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Graham, Sheik)
The former World Heavyweight Champions just keep coming. Superstar Graham is squaring up when the Sheik rolls into the ring. Sheik slaps his chest, twists his mustache and shouts “Iran #1” to a huge amount of boos. Graham charges, but gets booted to the but by one of the curled-toed boots. Sheik and Graham are slugging away at each other here.
Meanwhile, Terry Funk has managed to roll his body back into the ring and he kicks Steamboat away. Funk rakes the eyes to finally break Steamboat’s grip and then drives him to the canvas with a piledriver. Now, Funk stumbles across the ring with a double sledge to the chiseled back of Superstar Graham. With the help of the Iron Sheik, Funk dumps Superstar Graham over and out! (Superstar Graham is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S TED DIBIASE!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase)
Rick Steamboat doesn’t have to worry about a two-on-one situation for long because here comes his U.S. Connection partner Ted Dibiase. Dibiase storms into the ring and is fists of fire on both Terry Funk and the Iron Sheik. Dibiase shoots Funk off the ropes and propels him to the canvas with a high-angle back-drop, then levels him with a fist drop across the forehead.
Iron Sheik is stomping on Rick Steamboat in the ring, but Dibiase spins him around and decks him. Together, Steamboat and Dibiase shoot Sheik off the ropes and drill him with a double shoulder-block! The U.S. Connection are on fire here. If they have this kind of momentum in the St. Paul Scramble, they will be unstoppable!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S THE MAGNIFICENT MURACO!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco)
In the ring, the U.S. Connection are setting up Terry Funk for their finisher, which is a high-speed power-slam from Dibiase followed by a flying cross-body splash off the top by Steamboat. However, Muraco breaks it up by hammering Dibiase across the back. Steamboat dives off for a flying chop on Muraco, but he levels Rick with a shot to the gut on the way down! Iron Sheik is up now to put the boots to Steamboat and Dibiase here.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S DA CRUSHER!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, Crusher)
Another former World Heavyweight Champion! The wrestler who made Milwaukee famous gets a huge ovation from the one-time AWA crowd as he jogs down the aisle with a cigar in his mouth. Crusher puts it out as he rolls into the ring and wallops an unsuspecting Terry Funk, who does one of his classic comedy bumps. Crusher then pulls Iron Sheik around and begins pounding on him.
Da Crusher has the crowd going as he lays into the Iron Sheik with shot after shot! However, Don Muraco nails him from behind, stopping the momentum. Together, Sheik and Muraco dump out Crusher, ending his short run in the match. (The Crusher is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S DORY FUNK JR.!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, D. Funk)
The odds for the U.S. Connection are certainly not looking good now! Dory Funk Jr, another former NWA World Heavyweight champion, joins his brother Terry in working over Ted Dibiase in one corner while Sheik and Muraco try to get Rick Steamboat out on the other side of the ring for the next 90 seconds.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S OTTO WANZ!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, D. Funk, Wanz)
Another former World Heavyweight Champion makes his way down the aisle - although it must be said the reaction to the German is tepid at best. Otto tries to milk it for all it’s work, stopping at ringside to shake hands and pose his not-at-all impressive physique. He steps onto the canvas, waving to all of his adoring fans who don’t exist.
Finally, Otto Wanz actually steps into the ring to enter the match properly… and gets a double clothesline from the Funks to send him right back out again! Otto doesn’t miss a bit beat, waving to his fans and smiling as he walks back to the dressing room. (Otto Wanz has been eliminated.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S MAD DOG VACHON!
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Dibiase, Muraco, D. Funk, Vachon)
Here comes another former World Champion, and the Funks are ready. However, Rick Steamboat has broken away from Muraco and Sheik with some knife-edged chops and now he catches Dory Funk Jr. with a dropkick to send Dory over and out! (Dory Funk Jr. is eliminated) Steamboat hurls Terry Funk across the ropes and accidentally sends him colliding into his tag team partner Ted Dibiase, knocking Dibiase out onto the apron.
Steamboat checks on Dibiase until Funk attacks from behind while Mad Dog Vachon enters and begins hammering both Muraco and Sheik. Terry Funk goes to toss out Steamboat, but Rick puts on the breaks and sends Funk over the top rope! Funk collides with Dibiase on the apron again, knocking Dibiase to the floor! (Ted Dibiase is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ANDRE THE GIANT!/B]
(In the ring: Steamboat, T. Funk, Sheik, Muraco, Vachon, Andre)
There’s a huge ovation for the Giant making his way down to the ring. Back in the ring, Terry Funk slinks back in while Rick Steamboat apologizes to partner Ted Dibiase for the miscue. Dibiase is frustrated but tells his U.S. Connection partner to go win the match and gives him a thumb’s up, before heading off to the dressing room with his hands on his hips.
Andre steps right over the top rope and greets the Iron Sheik with a boot to the face. Don Muraco charges but gets swatted away as well. Terry Funk is just getting to his feet when Andre levels him with a headbutt, then hurls him over the top rope and out! (Terry Funk has been eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S JERRY ‘THE KING’ LAWLER!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Vachon, Andre, Lawler)
The King is followed by Lord William Dundee, and they’re cautiously taking their time getting down to the ring while observing Andre the Giant clearing house. Lawler finally slides in and when Andre spots him, The King holds his hands up like he doesn’t want any trouble. The King instead offers a handshake to the Giant as the fans here in Chicago boo him relentlessly.
Andre cracks a smile and looks around at the fans for their advice on if he should shake The King’s hand. Andre decides to shake Lawler’s hand, and The King has a grin from ear-to-ear. But that changes quickly when Andre begins applying pressure, immediately bringing Lawler to his knees begging for mercy. From behind, the Iron Sheik drives one of his boots into Andre’s back. The Giant releases his grip and turns around, while Lawler rolls over to the ropes so Dundee can massage his injured hand.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S PEDRO MORALES!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Vachon, Andre, Lawler, Morales)
The former WWWF World Champion sprints down the aisle, and hits the ring with shots on one-time rival Don Muraco. He plants Muraco with a big slam, and as Mad Dog Vachon charges, he ducks and back drops the Mad Dog over the top rope and out to the floor. (Mad Dog Vachon is eliminated.)
Andre The Giant has Iron Sheik bent over the top rope and lays into him with a vicious chop down across the chest! Lawler is back on his feet now and steering very clear of Andre, he blindsides Morales from behind and dumps Morales out by hooking the tights. (Pedro Morales is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S BOB BACKLUND!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund)
Former WWWF Heavyweight Champion Bob Backlund jogs to the ring and immediately goes after the man who dethroned him for that title, the Iron Sheik. Backlund takes Sheik down, but Sheik rolls over and grabs a crossface on him, with Backlund countering in kind. Their scuffle is broken up when Jerry Lawler drops an elbow on Backlund, then backs up, climbs to the second rope and levels him with a flying fist drop.
The King pops back up and laughs maniacally while Lord Dundee cheers him on from the floor. However, Andre the Giant grips Lawler’s head from behind and The King’s eyes bug out. Andre levels him with one… two… three headbutts! Down goes The King! Meanwhile, Muraco is trying to use all of his body weight to force Steamboat over and out.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S CRUSHER BLACKWELL!
(In the ring: Steamboat, Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund, Blackwell)
The Mountain from Stone Mountain is accompanied to ringside by his manager Sheik Adnan El-Kaissie and we heard him earlier say that his one goal in this match is take out Andre the Giant. Blackwell hits the ring and he’s immediately throwing forearms at Andre, who doesn’t back up an inch. Andre levels Blackwell with a headbutt, yet it doesn’t even stagger the Crusher.
Crusher Blackwell bounces back off the ropes and then clotheslines Andre, staggering him. He hits the ropes for another, but gets a boot to the face from Andre that staggers the Mountain from Stone Mountain. Rick Steamboat now lays into Blackwell with chops to the chest, but Blackwell picks him up and hurls him over the top rope! Rick Steamboat’s long run in the Rumble has been ended by Crusher Blackwell! (Rick Steamboat is eliminated.)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ‘THE AMERICAN DREAM’ DUSTY RHODES!
(In the ring: Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund, Blackwell, Rhodes)
Former NWA World Heavyweight Champion Dusty Rhodes fires up the Chicago crowd as he jukes and jives down the aisle of the UIC Pavillion. Once in the ring, Andre has leveled Blackwell with a headbutt and the Crusher walks right into a Bionic Elbow from the Dream! Blackwell is staggered, walking into a second headbutt from Andre, then a second Bionic Elbow from the Dream! Then, at the same time, Andre headbutts Blackwell and the Dream levels him with a third Bionic Elbow and down goes Blackwell! Andre raises his arm and Dusty leaps up for a high-five.
The celebration is short-lived when The King sundays Dusty from behind, but Rhodes is on a roll. Dusty unloads on Lawler with rights, lefts and then flip, flops and flies with another Bionic Elbow to send The King to the canvas! Dusty Rhodes jukes and jives as the crowd get to their feet to cheer on the American Dream!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S LARRY ZBYSZKO!
(In the ring: Sheik, Muraco, Andre, Lawler, Backlund, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko)
The self-proclaimed Living Legend of Professional Wrestling hits the ring just as Backlund has Iron Sheik in serious danger. Zbyszko scoops Backlund by the tights and dumps him over top of Sheik, sending Backlund tumbling to the floor. (Bob Backlund has been eliminated) Meanwhile, Lawler and Muraco are both working on Andre on the other side of the ring. Andre is holding his own fighting them off, but then Larry Zbyszko joins in.
Dusty Rhodes tries to get the villains off the Giant, but Blackwell decks him from behind and puts the boots to the Dream. With Muraco, Lawler, Sheik and Zbyszko holding Andre against the ropes, Blackwell charges and drills the Giant with a clothesline sending him backwards over the top rope to the floor! Blackwell has done it! He’s eliminated Andre the Giant! (Andre the Giant is eliminated)
The gravity of the situation is now dawning on Dusty Rhodes. He’s now all alone in the ring with the Iron Sheik, Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler, The Magnificent Muraco, Larry Zbyszko and the man who just eliminated Andre the Giant, Crusher Blackwell!
But not for long!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULK HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGAN!
(In the ring: Sheik, Muraco, Lawler, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan)
The roof nearly comes off the UIC Pavillion as The Hulkster storms down to the ring just as the heels all pounce on The American Dream. Hogan hits the ring like a house on fire, drilling Zbyszko with the Axe Bomber, rocking Muraco with a running forearm smash and cracking Sheik and Blackwell’s heads together. Hogan then motions that he’s gonna slam Blackwell, and he does it! He just slammed the Mountain from Stone Mountain!
Hulk has the Sheik by the back of the head now, takes off running and flings him over the top rope and out! (Iron Sheik is eliminated!) Muraco tries to land a double sledge, but Hogan boots him in the gut, hoists him up into an Atomic Drop and then clotheslines him over and out! (Don Muraco is eliminated!) Hogan then strikes a pose while the countdown begins.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S NICK BOCKWINKEL
(In the ring:Lawler, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel)
Bockwinkel joins Lawler and Zbyszko in stomping on Dusty Rhodes in the opposite corner. Nick seems to be calling the shots, which ticks off The King. These two have their own storied rivalry, so now The King and Bockwinkel are arguing with each other. From the floor, Lord Dundee is urging them to focus on Dusty Rhodes.
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S VERNE GAGNE!
(In the ring:Lawler, Blackwell, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel, Gagne)
It’s one more turn for the old champ Verne here in Chicago tonight and he gets a hero’s welcome on his way down to the ring! The arguing between Bockwinkel and Lawler provides the perfect distraction for Verne Gagne to enter and wallop his old nemesis Nick with a right hand across the jaw. Gagne is unloading on Bockwinkel now, and scoops him up into an airplane spin to a huge round of applause.
Meanwhile, Crusher Blackwell has Hogan in the opposite corner and he’s signaling for the running splash. Blackwell takes off with a head of steam… but Hogan dodges at the last second! Blackwell is woozy on his feet as Hogan hits the ropes for a forearm smash! Blackwell falls into the ropes but is still up, while Hogan charges again with a second forearm smash! Finally, a third forearm smash sends Blackwell tumbling backwards over and out! (Crusher Blackwell is eliminated)
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ‘THE MACHO MAN’ RANDY SAVAGE!
(In the ring:Lawler, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel, Gagne, Savage)
The Macho Man is full of energy as he sprints down the aisle, hops to the apron and then leaps over the top rope into the squared circle. Savage charges across the aisle with a flying knee into Hogan’s back to send Hulkster crashing into the turnbuckle. The Macho Man scales the top rope now, and that’s dangerous territory in a match like this! Savage comes flying off with a double axe-handle smash across Hogan’s forehead to send him crumbling to the canvas. Savage shoots the one arm into the air and spins his finger around as the fans boo.
Meanwhile, Larry Zbyszko is choking Dusty Rhodes using the bottom rope. Bockwinkel has Gagne locked in a side-headlock, but his old rival jolts him with a series of elbow shots to the side. Gagne manages to break the hold just as the countdown to the final entrant begins!
5-4-3-2-1!!!
IT’S ‘THE RAGIN’ BULL’ MANNY FERNANDEZ!
(In the ring:Lawler, Rhodes, Zbyszko, Hogan, Bockwinkel, Gagne, Savage, Ragin’ Bull)
The Ragin’ Bull hits the ring and immediately lays out Larry Zbyszko with the Flying Burrito coming off the ropes. Meanwhile, Nick Bockwinkel locks set to plant Verne Gagne with a piledriver. However, Gagne puts on the breaks! Gagne backdrops Bockwinkel, who flies over the top rope to the floor! (Nick Bockwinkel has been eliminated) As Verne Gagne raises his arms as if in victory while looking down at old enemy Bockwinkel on the floor, the Macho Man lands a big running knee to the back that sends Gagne gingerly bumping over the top rope and to the floor! ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage has just thrown out the legendary former AWA Champion! (Verne Gagne is eliminated!) Bockwinkel laughs at his rival while jogging to the dressing room, with Verne Gagne giving chase.
In the ring, Hulk Hogan is having his eyes raked by The King in one corner while The Ragin Bull is working over Larry Zbyszko in the other. Dusty Rhodes is pulling himself up now, just in time to get a sledge across the forehead from the Macho Man. Manny Fernandez has Zbyszko against the ropes and goes for another Flying Burrito but it’s a risk he shouldn’t have taken, because The Living Legend ducked and held down the top rope. That sent Fernandez down to the floor and out! (Manny Fernandez is out!)
Larry Zbyszko taunts the fans by pointing to his temples, indicating he’s smarter than the likes of The Ragin’ Ball. But not smart enough to be aware of his surroundings because The Dream was up and laid into him with rights, lefts, and then a Bionic Elbow that sent him bouncing over the top and to the floor. (Larry Zbyszko is eliminated)
We’re down to the final four here! In one corner, Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler and ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage talk strategy while in the other it’s Hulk Hogan and ‘The American Dream’ Dusty Rhodes. Hogan and Rhodes charge across the ring, with Hulk laying into Savage and Lawler battling with Rhodes. The Dream boots The King in the stomach and connects with a Bionic Elbow.
Lawler starts going backwards over the top rope, but from the outside, Lord Dundee reaches in and grabs Rhodes’ leg! Dusty is trying to free himself but it gives Lawler a second to recover and he pounces with some trademark vicious right hands to The Dream’s face while the referees try pulling Dundee away from Rhodes. The King then goes low with a kick between the legs before hoisting Dusty over the top rope and out! (Dusty Rhodes is eliminated)
On the other side of the ring. Randy Savage has tied the turnbuckle rope around Hogan’s throat to choke and now The King is over to begin stomping the chest. The two work over Hogan for several minutes, before Lawler motions for the end. The King hoists Hogan into the air and drops him with one of his patented leaping pile-drivers! Then, Randy Savage comes flying off the top rope with the elbow drop across the chest! But no sooner does Savage get back to his feet does Hogan sit up too…
The Macho Man can’t believe! The King can’t believe! Savage stomps Hogan, and it has no effect! Lawler decks Hogan, and it has no effect! Hogan is running on adrenaline as he powers up to his feet, shaking off more attacks and points to both! YOU! Hogan blocks a right hand from Savage, and sends him flipping to the canvas with one of his own! A right hand to Lawler sends The King back-bumping to the mat. The Hulker grabs Macho Man by the back of the head and launches him clean over the top rope and all the way out to the aisle! (‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage is eliminated)
Now, it’s The King’s turn! Lawler is begging off! He is on his knees begging for mercy here from The Hulkster. Hogan is shaking his head no! Seeing he’s getting nowhere, Lawler stands up and angrily demands Hogan bow down to him. Hogan can’t believe it! Lawler is ordering Hogan to bow down as Hogan stands staring at him, hands on hips. Lawler is now screaming at Hogan to comply, telling The Hulkster that it’s a royal decree! Finally, Hogan has had enough and he decks Lawler to send him to the canvas! Hogan then points to the aisle, motioning to fans he’s about to launch Lawler out to end this match!
Lord Dundee is on the apron though! Hogan is over and he collars Dundee. Lord Dundee is begging him not to hit him, promising he’ll go away if he’s released. Hogan listens for a second, then runs Dundee across the apron and head-first into the steel turnbuckle to send him flying to the floor! Hogan looks back at Lawler, who is screaming towards the dressing room and motioning. Out come the Blonde Battalion, Sir Wayne Ferris and Squire Buddy Landell!
The Blondes don’t look very excited to be getting involved but they have their orders from The King, so they charge up to the apron where Hogan doesn’t even let them step into the ring before cracking their heads together and launching them to the floor. The distraction allows Lawler to strike from behind, hook Hogan’s tights and try forcing him over the top rope. It looks for a moment like King's stunt might have been successful, but Hogan uses one hand to steady himself on the canvas and powers Lawler off of him with his right leg.
Lawler comes back around and eats a running axe bomber from the Hulkster! Hulk hits the ropes, and connects with the running leg drop! He pops back up and cups the ear as the fans cheer. He motions for one more and gets a huge ovation, so Hogan hits the ropes for a second running leg drop on The King! Hulkster then hoists Lawler up and throws him down onto his Royal Family on the floor! (Jerry ‘The King’ Lawler is eliminated)
Hulk Hogan has done it! He has won the Global Heavyweight Championship here at the Chi-Town Rumble!
Winner: *New* Global Heavyweight Champion Hulk Hogan
Vince McMahon tells fans that we’re running short on time, but there’s really only one thing left to see and that’s The Hulkster in all on his glory!
“HOLD ON, CUT THE MUSIC!”
Gorilla Monsoon isn’t sure what’s going on because his broadcast partner Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura has just stood up with a live microphone. Ventura waits until ‘Real American’ stops playing here in the UIC Pavillion.
Jesse Ventura: “Hey Chump Hogan… yeah YOU. I’m talkin’ to YOU, Hogan!”
Hulk Hogan has stopped his posedown, slings the Global Heavyweight Title and is now staring confused at Jesse Ventura over at the broadcast position.
Jesse Ventura: “I hope you enjoyed your little celebration but Jesse ‘The Mindy’ Ventura is here to tell you, Chump Hogan, that what you just did is meaningless!”
Hogan can be seen shouting “What the hell is he talking about?” as the camera cuts back to him for a second. The shot then goes back to Jesse Ventura pulling an elongated jewelry box out from under the broadcast desk.
Jesse Ventura: “See Chump Hogan, somebody wants to send you a message and because Jesse ‘The Mind’ Ventura is the preeminent broadcast journalist in the sport today, they asked me to deliver it to you. That strap you have is real pretty, but someone is on his way here, and he’s got a REAL championship. Why don’t you hit his music while I show you!”
There’s a buzz as Jesse Ventura hands an audiotape to the sound guy and a few seconds second later, the strains can be heard in the UIC Pavillion…
The unmistakable music coincides with Jesse Ventura opening the box directly to camera to reveal…
THE NWA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP BELT!
Gorilla Monsoon “Jess, gimme a break! You cannot show that on television! There were lawsuits!”
Jesse Ventura: “Gino Monsoon, I can do whatever I want! Chump Hogan, you and I both know who owns that belt. The Real World Heavyweight Champion! And he’d like me to deliver a message to you: Diamonds are forever and so is the Nature Boy! HAHA!”
The Chi-Town Rumble ends with Hulk Hogan angrily ordering Vince McMahon to explain the heck was going on while Jesse Ventura relishes in what he’s just done! Fans: the owner of that title, is he coming to the Global Wrestling Council and, if so, does he have plans to challenge Global Heavyweight Champion Hulk Hogan?
Hopefully we’ll have more information next week at the St. Paul Scramble!
© 1985, GLOBAL WRESTLING COUNCIL
Working on it now.