UWA FURY(5/8/88)
May 7, 2022 13:38:00 GMT
Post by grigs on May 7, 2022 13:38:00 GMT
The United Wrestling Alliance presents UWA FURY!!!
Taped 4/30/88 at the Cowtown Coliseum in Fort Worth, TX to air Sunday, 5/8/88, at 9 PM on the USA Network
Announcers: Lee Marshall & Magnum TA
Ring Announcer/interviewer: Mark Lowrance
Interviewer: Boni Blackstone
COLD OPENING:
VTR:
Outlaw Ron Bass stands in front of a fireplace. There's a roaring fire burning and a pair of steer horns mounted above the mantlepiece.
BASS: It's good to be home in the Lone Star State! There's no doubt in my mind who the greatest wrestler to ever come outta this state is and you're lookin at him-the Big Outlaw! Terry Funk, you and your family have ruled the roost around here long enough! Tonight, I'll show the state of Texas who's boss! After I knock off the so called “legend”, that yellow dog Billy Jack Haynes will have to give me the title match I deserve!
Terry Funk sits on the ring apron in an empty arena.
FUNK: I came to the UWA for competition and ,by golly, they're sure giving me what I came for! Tonight, I got a loudmouth named Ron Bass who claims he's the toughest Texan ever! Son, you've got the talkin part done, but let's you and me fight so we can see if your rear end can cash that check that your mouth wrote! The Funk Family has never backed down from a challenge here in our home state of Texas and I'm not breaking the tradition here in Fort Worth on UWA FURY!
VTR:
VTR OPENING:
As the music plays we see the following:
Billy Jack Haynes holding a championship belt above his head!
Haynes overhead press slamming an opponent!
Antonio Inoki hitting an enzuguri!
Billy Jack Haynes pressing Cannonball Grizzly over his head!
Jos LeDuc putting the bearhug on Tom Prichard!
Ron Fuller leading Master of Pain to the ring!
Buzz Sawyer hitting a powerslam!
Vader and Madusa coming down the aisle!
Nord the Berzerker coming to the ring, waving his sword above his head!
Terry Funk riding a horse across the plains!
MARSHALL: Welcome to UWA FURY! You heard at the outset of the show, we have the battle of the tough Texans right here tonight!
MAGNUM: I've wrestled Outlaw Ron Bass and he's as tough as they come, but Terry Funk is the Legend and my money is on him!
LEE: As Battle Bowl draws closer, wrestlers from around the world are putting in their bids to be a part of this unique event. Tonight, we have two major superstars who have signed to be a part of this amazing pay per view on May 14th in Albequerque! Mexico's Mil Mascaras and Japan's Tiger Mask have signed to make rare American appearances on this spectacular and we'll see both of them wrestle here tonight!
MAGNUM: Wow! Those two guys almost never wrestle on American TV, so you fans have a rare opportunity this week! Also, as we saw last week, Antonio Inoki is on his way to the UWA! It seems every week that get new and exciting talent!
MARSHALL: Magnum, let's go to Mark Lowrance for our opening match!
Iron Mike Sharpe vs. Ricky Rice: Early on, Ron Fuller and Jimmy Golden come to ringside and cheer Sharpe on. Rice puts forth a good effort, but Sharpe is simply too powerful. Iron Mike gets the duke after a piledriver. After the match, Sharpe, Golden, and Fuller head over to the interview area...
BONI: OK, I'm joined by the winner of our first match, Iron Mike Sharpe! Also, let me introduce “Tennessee Stud” Ron Fuller and Gentleman Jimmy Golden. Now, American Champion “Mad Dog” Buzz Sawyer and the Master of Pain have joined us. Iron Mike, congratulations on an impressive win, but I'm not sure why the Stud Stable is here...
SHARPE: It's kind of obvious, isn't it?
BONI: No, not really!
FULLER: Well, let me explain, young lady! We are always on the lookout for talent and what better talent than Canada's Greatest Athlete! Iron Mike Sharpe, welcome to my Stud Stable! This is a red letter day! And this isn't the only big announcement concerning the Stable! Stick around, we'll be back later in the show!
BONI: Buzz Sawyer, while you're here- any comments on Austin Idol getting you to submit to the Las Vegas Leglock here on UWA Fury last week?
SAWYER: I don't know what you're talking about, Blondie! I've never submitted once in my life! Master of Pain, you were my partner last week...did you see me submit?
MASTER: NO!!!!
FULLER: Don't harass my men with your pathetic attempts at yellow journalism, little lady! Austin Idol, with Canada's Greates Athlete on board, your days are numbered, boy! The Stable is ridin high!
COMMERCIAL
VTR: We see footage of UWA action as “Going The Distance” from the Rocky soundtrack plays.
MARSHALL: Battle Bowl is coming to pay per view on May 14th!!!! It starts with a Lethal Lottery where the luck of the draw will force enemies to work together and friends to fight against each other in a series of action packed tag matches! Then, the winners meet in Battle Bowl, the ultimate battle royal where the last man standing wins 500 grand, a future match for the Undisputed World Title, and the Lord of the Ring trophy!
Footage of a battle royal followed by Billy Jack Haynes holding the World Title belt above his head!
MARSHALL: Call your local cable provider first thing in the morning!
Tiger Mask vs. Paul Garner: The Japanese masked man gives an awesome exhibition of skill and athelticism. Tiger Mask scores the pin after a moonsault. Lee and magnum gush over how impressed they are with this great star!
BONI: Now, for something completely different, the Sheepherders and their flag bearer and cousin, Rip Morgan!
LUKE: You bloody Yanks are about to see two of the so called “top teams” in the US blood in a match! But their opponents aren't the Sheepherders! They don't want nothin to do with the team that has won titles in 37 different countries throughout the world!
BUTCH: Cousin, it seems whereve we go, these cowardly American tag teams are afraind to wrestle us! We thought for sure that the bloody Samoans would give us a title match straightway, but we're told that they ain't interested!
LUKE: Well, their homeland is called AMERICAN Samoa and their manager is a bloody Yank! Even worse, he's a bloody hillbilly!
BONI: Hey, this is an American girl you're talking to here!
BUTCH: Yeah, that's obvious! Give us some real women, sheilas from New Zealand any day of the week! Natural beauties, not these painted ladies with died hair! Ain't that right, cousin Rip?
RIP: ARRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
LUKE: We got a match later on tonight, all you bloody Yank teams better pay close attention! Samoans! Freebirds! Killer Bees! Nasty Boys! Simpson boys! Tennessee Stud, all of ya!
COMMERCIAL
Steve & Shaun Simpson & the Killer Bees vs.the Blackmailer, Johnny Mantell, Ken Raper, & King Kahlua: The Simpsons and Killer Bees use their speed and skill to score an impressive win. Brian Blair pins Raper after the Bees and Steve Simpson nail him with a triple dropkick. Magnum says he would like to see either of these teams take on the Sheepherders!
COMMERCIAL
The Sheepherders (w/Rip Morgan) vs. Greg Gagne & George South: Gagne gets some offense in on the Sheepherders, but the New Zealanders are too tough and experienced. Miller pins South after a double gutbuster. Magnum has to admit that Williams and Miller are double tough.
COMMERCIAL
As two opponents wait in the ring, “Badstreet USA” plays over the PA system and Buddy Roberts leads his Freebird brothers to the ring for our next match!
Michael Hayes & Terry “Bamm Bamm” Gordy (w/ Buddy Roberts) vs. Dr.X and “Bad Boy” Doug Vines: Magnum informs the fans that the Freebirds' contract is structured in such a way that when they are signed for an Australian rules tag match that any two of them can compete. Magnum claims that any combination of freebirds is a world class team so it really doesn't matter. Hayes and Gordy certainly look world class as Gordy powerbombs and pins Vines out of a Hayes backdrop. After the match, they visit with Boni...
BONI: We've seen a lot of impressive tag team wrestling here this week. None more impressive than the boys from Badstreet!
HAYES: That's right, sweet Boni! I understand that the champions, those big, bad Samoans are up next!
BONI: That's right!
HAYES: Tell ya what we're gonna do: We're gonna stay here with your pretty little self and catch our breath while those goofs wrestle! Then, we're gonna get in their faces!
BONI: Wow! We could have an explosive situation coming up next!
COMMERCIAL
The theme from “Jaws” plays and Ron Wright leads his UWA World Tag Team champions to the ring!
Super Samoans (w/ Ron Wright) vs. Brad Rheingans & Derrick Dukes: Afa & Koikina face two capable athletes tonight. Rheingans mat skills do cause a bit of trouble for the champs, but Afa pins Dukes after a Samoan drop. Then, the champs and their manager head to a crowded interview area!
BONI: Alright, I really don't want any trouble here!
HAYES: I'm willing to be a gentleman about this. Ron Wright, if they don't start nothin, ain't gonna be nothin!
WRIGHT: Fine by me, Hayes!
HAYES: On behalf of the Fabulous Freebirds, I'm here to challenge your Samoans to a title match!
WRIGHT: Nothin would please us more than to dish out a South Pacific dog whuppin to you boys! As far as a championship match goes, there's only one problem: The Freebirds ain't proved they deserve any such thing!
HAYES: What?
GORDY: Look, old timer, we've held championships all around the world!
WRIGHT: The past don't mean nothin! What have you accomplished in the UWA? Who have you beat?
Ron Fuller enters the picture...
WRIGHT: My dear friend Ronald, the Tennessee Stud! My beloved Ronald and I have made a business arrangement-If you three can beat three members of the Stud Stable, then and only then, my beloved Samoans will give you a title match! Any two of you!
ROBERTS: No Tennessee Dud scares us!
HAYES: We'll take some of that action!
FULLER: Hayes, you and your punk friends ain't even gonna get a sniff of a title match! My Stable will clean your clocks, boys!
BONI: What a development here on UWA FURY!
COMMERCIAL
Mil Mascaras vs. Moondog Moretti: The Man of a Thousand Masks outwrestles the rugged Moretti and puts him away with a flying bodypress. Lee and Magnum really put the legendary luchador over on commentary.
MARSHALL: Another great star on his way to Battle Bowl gave us some comments earlier. Let's hear from Adrian Adonis.
VTR:
Adrian Adonis stands outside of Madison Square Garden. Adonis is in full Hell's Kitchen tough guy mode, dressed in his leather jacket.
ADONIS: Behind me, you see the world's most famous arena! A building that Adrian Adonis has sold out many, many times! I've been lying low for the past year, getting in the best shape of my career and letting my wounds heal. In six short days, I come back! It's called Battle Bowl! It's on pay per view. 250 grand to the winner! They give a trophy to the winner and call him Lord of the Ring! And to top it off, the winner gets a World Title match against Billy Jack Haynes! I want it all and I'll do whatever I need to do to get it all! Adrian Adonis is back! That's good news fro me and bad news for almost everybody else!
MAGNUM: Another guy I've been in the ring with and he's as tough as nails!
MARSHALL: Battle Bowl keeps getting better and better! Very few tickets available at Tingley Coliseum in Albuquerque. The number for tickets is on the screen. Call your cable provider ASAP to view it in the comfort of your living room!
MAGNUM: The Battle of the Tough Texans when we return!
COMMERCIAL
Ron Bass enters the ring. The glove is already on his right hand and he looks mean and tough!
“Desperado” by the Eagles resounds through the building and Terry Funk slowly ambles toward the ring. Ron Bass can't seem to wait! He climbs out of the ring and attacks Funk before he can get into the squared circle!
“The Legend” Terry Funk vs. Outlaw Ron Bass: Bass dishes out a vicious beating to Funk on the floor before rolling him into the ring. Bass maintains the advantage for about five minutes before Funk makes a big comeback! It looks like it's over when Funk starts applying the spinning toehold! Bass counters back kicking Funk in the backside and sending him flying out of the ring! Bass grabs the timekeeper's bell and attempts to bash Terry with it, but Funk grabs a folding chair and proceeds to bash the Outlaw into a bloody pulp! Funk batters Bass all the way back to the dressing room where Bass counters by nailing Funk with a trash can! Bass continues to nail Funk with the trash can until Funk gets on his feet, tears the trash can away, and clobbers bass with it! At this moment, UWA President Frank Dusek, referees Scott LeDoux and Carl Fergie, as well as the Killer Bees, Greg Gagne, Brad Rheingans, Iron Mike Sharpe, Johnny Mantell, and Ron Fuller manager to seperate these two rowdy Texans. The official decision is a double countout.
NEXT WEEK:
JOHNNY ACE VS. CACTUS JACK!!!
KILLER BEES VS. SUPER SAMOANS!!!
AMERICAN TITLE MATCH: BUZZ SAWYER VS. BRIAN ADAMS!!!
MARSHALL: Don't forget to order BATTLE BOWL on pay per view, coming up next Saturday, May 14th at 8 PM! It's going to be spectacular!
Working on it now.